The Power Of Velour

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A friend’s Facebook post today of his infant self, garbed in velour, got me thinking about my days of velour, which, incidentally would be a great autobiography title. I stumbled across this 1979 Sears catalog image, and was reminded of a velour green dress I donned at Christmas that year (with a white satin blouse underneath-trust me, ’twas all the rage), in the final vestiges of the unseemly 70s. Or was it velvet or velveteen? Who can discern the magic of textiles?

Listen, I could collage up this joint and post all kinds of velour images across this page, but honestly, it’s overkill. I think we get the gist of velour off of just this one plush-fabric pic. It’s a lipglossy, pre-Working Girl meets Studio 54 (I almost said Area 51; Freudian slip) era, with the skinny belt, skirt slit, and stilettos, to boot. I can’t tell if they’re 13 or 43. But look at Miss Purple’s jutted elbow. She is NOT having sassy backtalk today. You flip through that Rolodex, girl. Fierce.

Now should we bring velour back? Heavens, no. When I see it in the wild nowadays (once just this year at church), I shake my head. The moment is over. It only whispers “Goodwill reject bin” from the fibers of its sheen. And we all know the only relevant sheen in 2018 is a Netflix Martin.

But can we take two minutes to appreciate it today? Even just saying the word is fun. Velour. Make it rhyme with sewer. Is it flattering? Heavens, no. It makes pre-teens look four months pregnant. Does it keep you warm? Yes. Did it take these girls from playgrounds to champagne? Or is the lyric “from crayons to perfume”? Whatever. Velour does that. That’s the power of velour.

10 thoughts on “The Power Of Velour”

  1. 1979 was definitely a year for velour in the UK too. It was the year one of my sisters was born and I remember wearing a lot of velour – mostly brown and navy – at that time. My mother had a velour jumpsuit that was a sort of cerise colour. It definitely doesn’t need to make a comeback.

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    1. Ooh, cerise! Nice word. I can see a fuchsia jumpsuit in my mind, but cerise is much better. Actually a nice girl’s name, come to think of it. The problem with jumpsuits is having to fold their entirety down when one is in the loo, especially a public loo, where the tile is unclean, and you’re just heaping loads of material into your lap, etc…

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  3. Ahh Velour. Remember it well. Never owned any myself but I believe my first wife had a dress made of the stuff. I think I actually knew a guy that wore velour work out clothes. You know. Loose fitting pants and loose fitting jacket. The kind the cool kids wore to the gym to pretend to work out. It was soft though.

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