Keep It On The DL


He’s got the pen, so he must be doling it out, but what is it? His digits? A prescription for antibiotics to treat an itchy rash? The name of a Sicilian hit man to take care of some unpleasant business? A list of television networks at the time?

How I Feel At The Movie Theater

UT Cactus Yearbook 1981
UT Cactus Yearbook 1981

Even before annoying ringtones and bright-screened smart phones, movie theaters could still be a wretched placed to spend two hours of your life. There were legs behind your seat that would kick you. Chatty people who didn’t know when to shut up. Babies. What moron brings a human under three years old to a movie theater? The late arrivals squeezing past you (and late means ANYONE ARRIVING AFTER 15 MIN PRIOR TO THE MOVIE). No arm room (the fella appears to be elbowing a man in plaid). The sound of popcorn being crunched in an adjacent person’s mouth. Slurping. And fart clouds. Always fart clouds.

Ima Hogg, First Lady Of Texas

Please visit me today as I guest-post about Miss Hogg.

The Blog of Funny Names

not kosher not kosher

Chances are, if you don’t hail from the Lone Star State, you mightn’t have heard about this lovely lady. Ima Hogg (1882 – 1975), known as “The First Lady of Texas,” was a philanthropist and collector of arts and antiques. Yes, that was her real name. Bless her heart. And you can blame her parents, Sarah Ann “Sallie” Stinson and James Stephen “Big Jim” Hogg, Attorney General of Texas and later Governor. Her first name was taken from The Fate of Marvin, which her uncle Thomas Hogg penned, and featured two young women named Ima and Leila. What was wrong with Leila?

As it turned out, she never married and was saddled with that name for all of her 93 years. Yikes. She knew it was an odd name, and tried to downplay it, using stationery that read Miss Hogg or I. Hogg. Her brother William defended the unfortunate name on more than one…

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