1970s, Advertising, Culture, Fashion, Fun, Funny, History, Humor, Nostalgia, Pics, Style, Vintage

If Puerto Ricans Can’t Choose Decent Shoes, How Can They Choose Decent Presidents?

Dec 79

Let me qualify that. Male Puerto Ricans. Puertorriqueños. From his bangs to his jaunty mustache, to his feminized clunky yellow sandals, to his flesh belt matching flesh socks, to his choice of stool, everything is wrong wrong wrong. Even 41 years later, his lady friend looks stylish and composed. But Enrique, not so much. I mean, look at his jean hem! Look at the cut of it!

I know Puerto Rico wants to be able to vote, and I don’t blame them. Really, the main barrier I can see is that we’d have to add another star to our flag, and OCD people would go nuts with an odd number of states. It wouldn’t line up correctly on the flag. We’d have to adopt yet another state to make it even. Or Texas could secede! Most folks my age still think we have nine planets; we’re not going to suddenly remember 51 states. Or we’ll say it with finger quotes, as if it isn’t real yet.

But maybe Enrique’s problem was that he was lit, juiced up on the rum for which he was plugging in this ad.

The thing is, they knew they were being photographed. Ingrid should have offered spously guidance. Could they even possibly still be married, after this atrocity? Or is the rum that good?

1940s, Advertising, Art, Culture, Fashion, Fun, Funny, History, Humor, Nostalgia, Style, Vintage

Nutty For Nylons

Joyce is over the moon with this new shade of nylons–in stylish palomino! The golden color would cover up her pasty white legs in no time!

Ladies, when’s the last time you gave an ounce of thought to the color of your pantyhose? Have you even purchased hose in this millennium? I never see anyone sporting them these days. Probably because they didn’t have EZ glove to remove “mannish leg-hair.”

But once those legs were shaved, it was time to don some Dancing Twins! And remember folks, these nylons necessitated garter belts. Peggy Sue hadn’t yet invented pantyhose. 😉 Seam-free nylons did the trick for THIS cute trick.

If nylons weren’t up your alley in 1947, you could stay feet-focused on trendy bobby sox, in an assortment of colors, sure to entice your local soda jerk.

And if you were a girl who knows what goes, you’d pull on some Bonnie Doons before strapping on your skates to burn off the calories from eating too many Lorna Doones.

But socks weren’t the end of the conversation. You had to accessorize them. Everybody’s doing it!

So much pressure on young women! These days, a woman can just pick an atrocious tattoo to reflect her inner soul. But back in 1947, sock buttons were the way to express yourself. Can you imagine anyone taking the TIME to interpret your sock buttons?

1930s, Art, Culture, Fashion, Fun, History, Nostalgia, Photography, Pics, Style, Vintage

Skilled Labor For Old Glory

August 1935 by Luis Marden

Welcome to an “old-fashioned wool-working exhibit” on the Common in Boston, where these contestants competed to win the knitting trophy. Originating in 1634, it is the oldest city park in the United States. The squares of 200 women (and the one lone fellow shown above) were pinned on a board to form the Stars and Stripes. In just one day, they created this woolen flag.

1930s, Art, Culture, Fashion, Fun, History, Nostalgia, Photography, Pics, Style, Vintage

Not Actual Size

May 1932 by Luis Marden for Nat Geo

Okay, so it’s 1932 on Milk Street in Boston, a street that has been there for over 300 years. These three bobbed-hair women marvel at the carving prowess of Carl Larsen, who fashioned this wooden Indian out of live oak. Why an androgynous youth is bowing before the altar is another issue altogether. But this is no ordinary Indian offering cigars to outdoor patrons; this is Samoset the Abenaki extrovert, best known for waltzing up to Plymouth Colony on March 16, 1621, greeting, “Whassup, Pilgrims!” and then inquiring if they had any ale on hand. Why was this odd? Well, he was the first American Indian to make contact with said Pilgrims, having learned some English from Maine fishermen. And despite what news stations would have reported, had they existed, everyone got along peaceably, and Samoset even spent the night. A week later, he returned with his buddy Squanto, who spoke better English, and more fellowship ensued, presumably with beer.  This particular wooden Indian was denied the pleasure of ale, although he did get a periodic dose of boiled linseed oil poured down a hole in his head, to keep his wood from cracking.

1950s, Advertising, Beauty, Culture, Fashion, Fun, Funny, History, Humor, Nostalgia, Photography, Pics, Style, Vintage

Revlon Releases Hot New Fall Color: Not Today, Satan

April 1954

Actually, it wasn’t Revlon; it was Cutex, a name we associate today strictly with nails, not lips. But back in the day, they offered coordinated colors for style from head to toe! Step off, Satan! I’m fabulous!

1940s, Culture, Fashion, Fun, History, Humor, Nostalgia, Photography, Pics, Style, Vintage

Hot Off The Press: Fake News

1962 Silver Spruce

This all seems fishy. Let’s print it!

Networks don’t care about accuracy. They want ratings. Unity doesn’t get viewers. So why not flat-out tell lies, “change the narrative,” incite violence and unrest, and frighten folks with the scariest topics we can find. Corona! Lockdown! Second wave! Riots! Wildfires! Floods! Division! Your neighbor hates you and always has! The economy is sinking! What about your 401K? And all this followed by that incessant Boy Scout rape commercial that lasts about four minutes. Wouldn’t it be nice to watch a Good News network? Journalists, tell us something positive!

1948 Ventana

Let’s call the editor and give her a piece of what for.

1947 Yucca

What’s that? A march for hope and joy? People lining the streets with smiles on their faces? What’s that? We have more in common with each other than what separates us?

Sure, 2020 sucks. No doubt about it. And it does seem to be getting worse–and getting better and getting worse.  But, hey, you and I are still alive to blog. Most of us probably even had the virus by now. But, wait! You’ll have everlasting side effects that destroy your health! Maybe, but life is a crapshoot. Any day we wake up is a gift. No guarantees.

At least we can still spin some vinyl.

We can still dance, if only with one partner, or even by ourselves.

We can still buy hats–or even masks that reflect our political, religious, or social ideologies–if that floats your boat.

We can nap and read periodicals.

We can still drive.

And most of us can still eat out.

And guess what? When the holiday season starts in one month, we can start wearing festive Christmas sweaters again.

Who can be sad with reindeer on their chests?

So just remember, it’s okay to relate to this.

But don’t forget this:

1930s, Beauty, Fashion, Fun, History, Nostalgia, Photography, Pics, Style, Vintage

Packing Some Heat

LIFE 7/38

Miss Lesley E. Bogert strides with purpose through a parking lot of curvaceous vehicles, off to cavort among fellow Newport socialites of the 1930s. Her father, Beverley Bogert, was a prominent New York banker.

This article from the April 14, 1935 Daily News gives the deets on her relationship with Russia’s Prince George. Note how she is described as “apple-cheeked, plump and roly-poly,” which seems inconsistent with the image above.

By the way, “caracul” is an Asian sheep with a dark curled fleece when young. You know, like most of us wear.