Y’all know I love old pep rally pics. The joy on the students’ faces, the smiles, the excitement. Not as jaded as these days.
The whole first row is clapping. No one is too cool for school. I just like to zoom in on these people and wonder what they were thinking. Were they whooping, hollering, or doing an Indian war cry? I love the shirt print, the jackets, the glasses, the cowboy hat, the hair.
Your guess is good as mine on this last one. Methinks it might be a Senior Skit, with some gender reversal all in good fun.
Are two of these grown women holding a fake poodle and a fake dachshund in their laps? Note their reactions to having “a record” explained to them by Bossypants McGee.
“Don’t nobody touch my Coke.”
Okay. I’m concerned now. I don’t think those dogs are legit. Is she petting the poodle?
Have you ever seen a finer looking bus than this? Look at this condiment-colored sexy beast, truckin’ along in majestic Heinz 57 and Grey Poupon paint job. Get down with your bad self, Trailways Bus!
I don’t know if this happens to y’all, but many is the time I’ve passed an aisle of plush dog beds (at Target or Ross or PetSmart) and thought, Dang, that looks pretty comfortable. But then I look at the tag of $39.99 and I’m all Oh, no, Sir. Fact is, we tossed all our dog beds long ago because our dogs stay outside. They are shedders, and I keep a clean house, to the extent that when Stanley Steamer came a couple weeks ago, they said ours was the cleanest carpet they’d ever seen. And it’s eight years old!
Anyway, the point is, if I weren’t so hellbent on order and rules, I might just take one of my cushy couch cushions and fling it on the floor as a makeshift dog mat myself. But that is not how civilized people comport themselves. We do not sit on floors.
So you can imagine my surprise when I was flipping through a fantastic book, The Image Makers, and came upon this sight.
Rudolph Valentino, 1924
Yes, that’s Valentino himself, The Sheik, the silent film star, sitting on a perfectly good dog mat. But I guess when you’re wearing an Asian outfit, you sit on the floor like Japanese people do when they eat.
konstantmotion.wordpress.com
That makes my back hurt, just looking at it. Oh, my lumbar! But I tell you what. I think I see a dog bed right there under that jacket.
And while we’re on the subject of beds, let’s talk Valentino’s marital bed. In 1919, he married actress Jean Acker, who just happened to be involved in an all-gal love triangle with actresses Grace Darmond and Alla Nazimova. Acker self-servingly married Valentino to hit control-alt-delete on that threesome, but evidently wanted no part of his body and locked him out of their room on their wedding night. The marriage was never consummated. Not even in a dog bed.
Turns out he died at 31, after surgery for appendicitis and gastric ulcers. I’m not going out like that, just so you know. When the public found out, rioting ensued. People committed suicide. No lie! Over 100,000 folks lined the streets to view his body. Like this lady.
wikipedia
That’s crazy, right? Pretty fancy coffin/deathbed. And speaking of fancy, check out Toto…
I’m sorry, but unless that dog poops gold coins, I can’t see how he needs that. And honestly, it really defeats the purpose of having a mobile dog bed, something to toss all devil-may-care wherever you like. You already know my back hurts. If I’m ponying up big money for a dog bed, there better not be wood involved. It better be all cushion. Or better yet, just like this:
You’d think the idea of “just turn it around” would create all kinds of neck injuries upon impact. I’ve never seen a car like this, so I guess the idea never took off.
Nope. Here’s the headline from a July 2015 article: Volvo Takes Kids’ Safety To New Heights, Showcases Customised XC90 SUV Featuring Innovative Baby Seat.
What do you think? Does this look safe for baby? What if Jumpsuit Barbie flings all 105 lbs of her waxed body into him at a hard stop? Would that be a good idea? And won’t Barbie be silently resenting her position, relegated to the back seat, second priority in Ken’s life? That’s got to mess with her psyche. I don’t see it happening, Volvo.
Looking at the hibiscus flowers this morning, I was reminded of the old Sesame Street sketch Abierto, Cerrado from the 1970s. What looks so shriveled and meh when it’s closed, becomes pink and gorgeous when it opens. I bet Maxwell the Dog has seen his share of hibiscus flowers. Eh, Max?
Okapis are odd creatures. Like God reused zebra leg parts on them. Maybe that’s why their name sounds like “Oh, copy.”
I don’t know what this is, but it’s licking a pole. Maybe an antelope.
Licking a pole. I’m pretty sure that’s part of Miley’s latest cardio routine.
And you know what this is. Doesn’t his foot look uncomfortably contorted? Rhinoceros horns are made from a protein called keratin, the same substance used in my Suave hair treatment.
This thing getting right up in your face is a hyena. Reminds me of when Mufasa got right up in those young hyena’s faces in The Lion King. Don’t let their dingo-dogginess fool you. Death to hyenas!
Then there were some birds:
pink flamingos, which remind me of a Port Aransas souvenir t-shirt I scored in the 80s
whatever these are (maybe zebra birds)
and this duck, who seems to be saying to the turtle, “Zero bothers given.”
And that’s the last of the San Antonio Zoo pics. Now I have to go bake some brownies and clean off the back porch table so the boys can eat crispy beef tacos out there for dinner (we always have a 0% chance of rain, so no worries of precip) and take some Vitamin D supplements that won’t absorb in my body anyway and get the hub’s load of laundry out of the washer and into the dryer, and at some point get to the store to try out that Dr. Scholl’s foot assessment machine and see if their $50 insoles can help my heels feel better. Hope you have a good weekend!
I Don't Get It 
