No, no, just kidding. Actually, that’s animal trainer Doug Sues sitting on the back of famous screen star, Bart the Bear, then a young 10-year-old weighing 1300 lbs. Bart lived to age 23, passing in the year 2000, from a battle with cancer. No telling how many times he kissed Doug right in the puss.
Back in 1987, Cindy Crawford may have been bronzed (and possibly narcoleptic), but she lacked the use her right eye.
Once her tan had faded, only her left eye was functional, and seems to have contracted a nasty case of pink eye, to boot.
Linda was the next victim of vision impairment, which may explain her shoddy yellow eye shadow application.
Christie’s left eye is hidden beneath this fetching safety pin hat. It might prove helpful if she needs emergency hemming.
Iman was only partially impaired by her curly strands. However, her poor lobes were taxed with cutlery. Nothing like the feel of prongs scraping against your collarbone to remind you that forks are the enemy of supermodels.
Nowadays, it’s important to have both eyes free of impediments so that you can properly text while driving. Eyes work better in tandem. Just ask this guy!
Per the late Dominick Dunne (who took this picture), Natalie Wood (with whom he often supped at Hollywood parties) had the habit of reapplying lipstick after dinner, using the blade of her knife as a mirror.