ABC Christmas
Category: Nostalgia
After Christmas Dinner
Bienvenido A Miami, Part Tres
First off, let’s give thanks to the hardworking yearbook photographers, who not only captured this great winter wonderland, but would have had to do serious bicep work to carry those old school cameras.
Remember that this was an era before Liquid Paper. Imagine all the retyping that had to be done.
The editor proofs some copy, smoking what appears to be a redskin headdress feather, but may well be a blurry pipe.
And check out the fly neckties on these fellows.
Cheers to the yearbook staff of the 1949 Recensio–may you all have your own blogs on WordPress, if you are still alive.
Bienvenido A Miami, Part Dos
Part of the university experience is college ball, and Miami University is no different. Here comes the marching band, flanked by costumed Redskins.
And just watch how excited the crowds look this Saturday morning! How about that Christmas sweater smack dab in the middle?
How could they possibly lose with these guys on their team?
Let’s don’t forget about the ladies, getting their lacrosse on.
But some prefer to stay indoors and bowl in the air conditioned bowl-o-rama.
And certainly don’t mess with the gals on the archery team. They’ll shoot your eye out.
Bienvenido A Miami, Part Uno
When you think of Miami, you probably think of Miami, Florida. I do. Or the Will Smith song that speaks of the coastal city. You probably don’t think of Miami University in Ohio, of all places, where this picture was taken in 1949. Here is a portrait of dorm life–before cell phones, before TV, before rock ‘n’ roll–where women could look attractive in penny loafers and saddle oxfords instead of 5″ stiletto stripper heels.
I’d never even heard of Miami University, the 10th oldest public university in the United States. The university, which offered classes in 1824, existed long before Miami, Florida was incorporated as a city in 1896. And that’s one to grow on!
These fellas seem to be enjoying campus life as well. They didn’t need no stinkin’ Blu-Ray or mobile apps to be content. Just a book and a lamp and some swanky robes. 
At the time, the mascot was the Miami Redskins, but a politically correct climate necessitated a change to the Miami Redhawks. Lame.
Back then, it was also cool to smoke, especially while sunbathing–or turning your skin red. Yes, I said it.
Nowadays, it’s inadvisable to start a family while in college. And who could afford it under this administration anyway? But in the post-war years, students were often married and raising families. And evidently living in ramshackle cabooses with picket fences built by unskilled laborers.
This next gathering is a group of gals in the “Outing Group.” It’s not what you think; they went on picnics and hikes together over frostbitten leaves. And apparently, they were keen on swastikas as well.
Perhaps after a long day of hiking and antisemitic rallies, the girls would hit the town. ( To be fair, swastikas meant “it is good” for years before the Nazi party used it. Let’s take it back, people!). Downtown Oxford, Ohio offered up restaurants as well as a movie theater.
The Miami-Western Theatre (oooh, the British spelling!) prided itself on being the only diversion in a “rather dull town.”
No worries if you spilled soda pop or melted Junior Mints on your glad rags at the cinema; you could just take them on down to Redskin Cleaners.
They’ll clean your dirty cords.
Stay tuned for Part Dos!
Christmas Mold
I don’t suppose Santa would prefer a jiggling foot-high Jell-O mound to a batch of warm Tollhouse Cookies, but it’s better than nothing–and low on calories. Although I would never allow my toddler to sleep under a table for safety reasons, I can confirm that the pose is a common one for children, as though they were kneeling in prayer and simply toppled forward. My concern is the rodent in a cradle on the mantle. ‘Twere I Santa, I would question the hygiene of the home and pass on the gelatin altogether.
Let’s Hear It For The Tigers
I love this shot for these reasons:
- the joy on the faces of the cheerleaders
- the animated boys in the background, chock full of increasing testosterone, apparently holding up the roof with their palms
- the cat’s eye glasses
- the multiracial shoulders jam-packed against one another
- the unadulterated glee on that girl’s face to the far left, and her friend who should have had a V-8
- the girl on the far right with her hand to her chest, as well as the boy above her clasping his hands, both of them silently saying, “MY stars…”
I was born in the wrong decade.
Don’t Kick Sand In Their Faces
Lemons Into Lemonade
In My Country, Too, We Like Its Speed
I like the vagueness of the token foreigner’s words, “my country” because that could mean anything. Perhaps he is a successful businessman, since he is well-dressed and has access to slick hair creams. I like his grand gesture as well. It’s like he’s welcoming Barbara Bush to Fantasy Island.
Perhaps some of you are programmed to be on the lookout for racism, so you can’t possibly enjoy this. Let’s find an opportunity to be offended; won’t that be fun? But break down his words; there isn’t anything pejorative there. He’s not represented in a demeaning way. He’s not dressed in rags or carrying a water vessel on his head–or a towel–or a sombrero. He’s simply declaring that all countries can appreciate the merits of Convair. And if it still existed, perhaps I could, too.
Countdown to Thanksgiving
As you prepare for your Thanksgiving holiday in LESS THAN TWO WEEKS, keep these important facts in mind:
- If your in-laws are coming to your home, stock up on Pepto-Bismol. And remember what Benjamin Franklin said: “Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days.” Hollah.
- If you’re the one traveling, make sure your vehicle has been well-maintained. I can’t overstate this enough.
- When you’re fueling up, use high anti-knock gasoline. You never know what kind of weather you will encounter.
- Many Americans enjoy spending hours swilling beer and watching football as a way of offering up thanks on this four-day weekend, so make sure your big screen TV is not on the fritz.
- Don’t forget the most important part: dessert! Everyone loves pies–pumpkin, pecan, apple, sweet potato, blackberry, chocolate cream, coconut cream…There’s always room for dessert.
- But above all, avoid excessive gluttony.
- And remember what it’s all about, Charlie Brown–an annual tradition since 1863, when Lincoln proclaimed a national day of “Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens.”
Tales of a 150-lb Has-Been
The August 23, 1958 Saturday Evening Post caught my eye because of the beautiful artwork on the front cover.
Despite the dainty waving, it’s a lovely summer log cabin scene called Visitors to Cabin in the Woods. I ponied up the dollar for the magazine and peeked inside. I discovered a two-page article on Francesca Marlene de Czanyi von Gerber, aka Mitzi Gaynor. Most of us remember her from South Pacific.
The article featured this playful shot of her on the beach.
Ummm, am I blind? I think she could qualify as a raving beauty. I mean, come on. Fellas, would you kick this Technicolor lady out of your bed?
The article goes on to show a picture of her with her husband, Jack Bean. With his encouragement, she lost the disgusting 35 lbs she had been schlepping around like an elephant.
Thankfully, Jack transformed her into a 37-20-36 and revitalized her fledgling career. She was then able to make movies with Gene Kelly, where she posed in unnatural positions such as this for The Fart Whisperers.
It seems that marrying Mr. Bean (not this one)–
but this one–
served her well, as they were married until his death in 2006. And as far as I can tell, she kept her figure. A round of applause, for you, 82-year-old Mitzi Gaynor. Not a has-been at all!
I Don't Get It 