
Month: January 2015
Double Drinking Dorothy Hamill

If you are too young to recall the famous wedge haircut made famous by 1976 Olympic figure skating champion Dorothy Hamill, consider yourself lucky. It was a trend amongst women of the late 1970s, and the immediate regret caused many to self-medicate with frosty longneck beers. Consider these two ladies, rocking the double H: the Hamill and highwaisted jeans. And just in case you can’t read their shirts, they say: Bored Martyrs. Indeed.
How To Not Meet Anyone’s Gaze
This Little Piggy Caused A Fiery Rage
Ixnay On The Altsay, Please
So If You Could Just Stop Touching My Chest…
Sepia Smokers
Smiles, Sledding, And That One Sullen Guy With Great Cheekbones
Being With You, Being With You
First My Hair, And Now This
Johnny Got A Guitar
You have to pronounce it with emphasis on the first syllable: GUI-tar. That’s how it’s said.
So here’s what confuses me on this (my I Don’t Get It moment). This looks like a 50s rock ‘n’ roll impromptu set in the commons, some ragtag gathering of rebellious devil music. But if this Texas yearbook is a 1951 edition, then the schoolyear was only ’50-’51, and the first legit rock hit wasn’t until 1955 with Bill Haley and the Comets’ (see the Comet connection?) hit “Rock Around The Clock.” It wasn’t even written until 1952.
Elvis was only 16 in 1951. Ritchie Valens a mere 10. So what was this kid doing with his guitar? Surely not playing these top ten hits of 1951.
| 1 | Nat King Cole | Too Young |
| 2 | Tony Bennett | Because Of You |
| 3 | Les Paul and Mary Ford | How High The Moon |
| 4 | Rosemary Clooney | Come On-a My House |
| 5 | Mario Lanza | Be My Love |
| 6 | Weavers | On Top Of Old Smoky |
| 7 | Tony Bennett | Cold, Cold Heart |
| 8 | Perry Como | If |
| 9 | Mario Lanza | Loveliest Night Of The Year |
| 10 | Patti Page | Tennessee Waltz |
Now the interwebs tell me that classic rock and roll is “usually played with one or two electric guitars (one lead, one rhythm), a string bass or (after the mid-1950s) an electric bass guitar, and a drum kit.” And I’m sure Mark the Music Man will know more about this than I. It just seems a bit early to go taking your first real six-string (if that’s what it is; I am ignorant) to school to serenade your peers, especially to play lame old people music. On top of old smoky…♫ ♫ ♫
Celebrate Good Times, Come On
Can you remember the last time you felt this overjoyed? This elated? I can’t. What on earth at this stage of your life could make you literally jump for joy and raise your hands in the air? Two points in basketball? Gas for $1.65? That’s what I filled up for this morning, peeps. Raise the roof on that one.










