Category: Humor

Elsie and Elmer Borden: A Lesson In Dairy Dysfunction

December 19, 1949 LIFE
December 19, 1949 LIFE

The First Couple of Borden’s Milk products always seemed to be arguing, as they graced the pages of LIFE magazine throughout the 1940s and 50s.

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Elmer was controlling.

Elsie was passive aggressive. But, dear…

The ad continues for nearly a DOZEN paragraphs, nothing for which today’s reader would have time. The dialog eventually addresses the product of Christmas. None Such Mince Meat.

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Can you imagine an ad today making reference to Cabbages and Kings? Would most readers understand a reference to the 1904 O. Henry novel, itself a reference to Lewis Carroll’s Through the Looking Glass? I shant believe it.

Not only have I never tasted None Such Mince Meat, I have never seen hide nor hair of it. The main ingredients include raisins, molasses, dried apples, beef and spices. Not what I think of when I think of pie.

dec19-49-002

And what about you? Have you ever put a forkful of this into your gullet?

Later, Elmer asks, “Didn’t they punish nagging wives in the public square?” To which Elsie responds, “What a silly idea! Who’d make the mince meat pie while the wife was in the square?” Yikes! Better make sure that eggnog is spiked for tonight’s meal.

Crazy Eyes

hhdog

I was perusing the site of a nearby dog shelter yesterday, and I came across this Anatolian Shepherd mix named Duke. I couldn’t help but share the photo. Could you wake up to this face each morning? Is the blue eye (a product of his Heterochromia iridis condition) too disconcerting? And what about his ears?

Manly Modern-Day Hipster Time-Travels Back To 1964, Reveals Smart Phone

64 Westerner
64 Westerner

Is it me or does the bearded one look out of place among the other boys of Boyden Hall? Are they comparing notes in their little black books? Why is one guy wearing the potent combination of pajamas and flip-flops (and possibly a priest’s collar)? I don’t get it.

Well, One Lady Nailed It

64 Westerner
64 Westerner

Students of Indian descent pose for a group shot, although only one woman seems aware of where to focus. I’m going to take a guess and say none of these is a common Indian surname. But keep in mind our family has visited three different Dr. Patels in the past year.

This Is How We Do It

by Philip Gould/Corbis
by Philip Gould/Corbis

September 1, 1997

Two Medicare-eligible ladies in sensible flats don their finest LSU purple apparel (they have spirit, yes, they do) and enjoy a pre-game tailgate lap luncheon. 

leggs

Keep Portland Weird

Natl Geographic Feb '68
Natl Geographic Feb ’68

Nope, those aren’t creative trick-or-treaters; it’s a family of Colorado Indians in Santo Domingo de los Colorados in Ecuador. Evidently, a new asphalt highway had been paved across their forest home, and the value of their land gave them beaucoup spendin’ money. So off they went to score Dad more sheer yellow scarves, whilst donning the traditional tribal stripes–regardless of the fact that horizontal lines are not slimming. In lieu of mousse or gel, Dad styled his hair with achiote paste, scooped from the plant pod.

For a closer look, fellow Colorado Indian Felix Calazacon models the red-paste hairdo.

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Impressive. Should you so desire to mimic said hairstyle for your own costume desires, products are available.

http://www.cooksinfo.com/
http://www.cooksinfo.com/

Tradition still goes strong in 2016, and this happy family seems to be enjoying life.

pinterest
pinterest