Look, we all have obese friends who ask too much of our heirloom furniture that we just had appraised on Antiques Roadshow by those buff Keno twins, and that stinks, but the good news is that Texaco can MARFAK your car. What on earth?
Snapping wicker=bad
40 Point lubrication=good
Makes perfect sense, right?
Did you realize these unkempt tramps were to blame for the ruin of the running board? Neither did I. Not until today. But this 1941 Chevrolet ad has opened mine eyes to the truth.
Just look at those adjectives: swank and streamlined. Running boards were preventing those adjectives from existing. And look how happy she is! A woman who wears an entire colony of minks on her frame is a woman I can trust. Maybe it’s badgers, wolverines–I don’t care, as long as they keep her warm.
And did you know there was a real fear of package-carrying tweens in knee breeches and dress shoes attacking your windows if your car had running boards? It was practically an invitation.
Here I was thinking auto makers had simply stopped caring about style, but all along, I was wrong. I had never stopped to consider the peril involved in taking TWO STEPS.
This is what they mean when they talk about light-bulb moments, friends. Running boards were downright dangerous.
It’s December, folks. Some of you Northerners can relate to Trenchcoat Trent and the loss of his dapper derby. Should that really happen in a civilized country? God bless Chevrolet for hitting CTRL+ALT-DEL on the cursed running board.
If it’s toasted, it can’t be that bad.
And what about these couples from a 1929 Camel ad? Don’t they look cozy and warm in the amber glow of a Prohibition-era eatery? If I couldn’t drink, I’d be smoking, too. Enjoy your finery and walking sticks while you got ’em, folks. Nine months ’til Black Tuesday…
This 1933 ad for Budweiser is so colorfully delicious, that I almost forgot my many encounters with the “King of Bottled Beer” and the inherent mehness it consistently offers. My Bud experience has ne’er entailed a sunbursting orchestra as fancy dancers trip the light fantastic. Then again, 1933 was the year that the 21st Amendment to the Constitution was ratified, ending national Prohibition. Any ale tastes good after 14 years of illicit backwoods hooch.
He’s got the pen, so he must be doling it out, but what is it? His digits? A prescription for antibiotics to treat an itchy rash? The name of a Sicilian hit man to take care of some unpleasant business? A list of television networks at the time?
I Don't Get It 