I am as excited as the Saturday Night Live Target lady today! Not only did I procure another ancient history yearbook for my collection, but it cost ONE DOLLAH. Yippee!
SNL Target Lady
It was during this 1963-1964 school year that JFK was shot and killed. But honestly I don’t know if that was enough to make these Oklahoma Sooners put down their cups for one second. The fraternities and sororities sure knew how to party:
I didn’t know “raise the roof” was a popular term fifty years ago, but these fun-loving Greeks were clearly raising it.
And they partied like rock stars. Even Bo Diddley got in on the action.
But partying can get out of control. I think Roger got a little too fresh with Jeanne…
Pi Kappa Alpha partied like Royals at their Dream Girl Party. No red solo cups here.
Old or young, it didn’t matter. DEKEs liked to have a good time.
Delta Kappa Epsilon
Eileen could barely contain her excitement at the TGIF Party.
Alpha Epsilon Pi
Linda screamed when a zebra-jacketed matador sat on her lap at the Bowery Ball
These Delta Gamma gals showered Ned with Christmas cheer.
Sigma Delta Tau knew their second amendment rights.
And Zeta Tau Alpha wore their sunglasses at night. Too cool for school, you guys.
I just got another stack of old magazines, and this ad jumped out at me from a 1960 Look.
What’s right with this ad:
Sexy moodlight
Her smooth, parted hair, clipped low at the neck.
It rhymes. That’s pretty cool. “Put the finest label on your table.”
What’s odd with this ad:
He’s pouring Miller (the champagne of bottled beer) from one presumably cold glass container into another. What was wrong with the bottle? I’ve never understood that. And he’s not even tilting the pint glass to reduce that drastic amount of head. Hold it at at a 45° angle!
Miller is from Milwaukee. Why does this ad look so Polynesian? Is this a theme party with Mediterranean olives and French bread and Greek spit-roasted lamb?
I’m frightened by the menacing tiki sculpture in the background. It looks like one of those angry apple trees in The Wizard of Oz.
The seasonal conflict: his shirt says winter, her dress says summer.
His apron is too clean. Somebody had to rub that meat.
This is too much food for two skinny white people. In fact, the lettuce appears to be making a getaway from the salad bowl. And you know such a demure, classy woman would never dare to consume more than 4 oz of meat at a time. Perhaps that partially lit door indicates a patio party. And those half a dozen plates imply guests are coming.
If they are preparing for said patio party, why aren’t they arguing? You know he didn’t buy all the ingredients she asked him to pick up at the store. He should have brought a pen to cross them off the list, like she told him a million times. Perhaps her look is one of passive aggressive seething rage. He’ll get his later.
He knows he’ll get his later. That’s why he’s topping off his third glass already. The fact that he forgot their anniversary last weekend didn’t help matters. Keep drinking, Ted. Keep drinking.
There’s no denying the magical combination of camel and flare red, and no better time to cover your body with it than fall. Autumn. November. And that’s NOW. So go get your camel and flare red on!
The youth of today love Taylor Swift, and even she proclaims, “Loving him was red.” Look at those models and how interested they are in that gawky adolescent boy, holding a strawberry malted. Loving him is undeniably red.
Nevermind that she’s still in character as Daisy Duke in those ratty shorts that are binding up at her crotch, and please overlook the shoulder-padded jacket she stole from Melanie Griffith in Working Girl. The point is the BAG. The neutral and the POP of color.
But let’s not get distracted. It’s not the Hump Day Camel.
For people of my generation, Bob Denver will forever be Gilligan, the Skipper’s “Little Buddy.” But to my parents’ generation, Bob Denver remains Maynard G. Krebs from The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis (also known as simply Dobie Gillis ), a sitcom that aired from 1959 to 1963. Maynard was TV’s first beatnikand jive-talking bongo player, and wannabe hepcats thought he was cool. Even Montgomery Ward took notice and offered trim tapered cotton ivy shirts for those in the know.
In case you missed it, here’s a close-up:
So it wasn’t Moon Zappa or Valley Girls who coined “like” after all. Mainstream American catalogs were doing it way back in 1962. They even used Maynard’s bongo-playing likeness to sell their combed cotton eversheen coats.
Facial hair? What the what? And check out these bobble heads. I wonder what they’d be worth today, American Pickers? Antiques Road Show? Pawn Stars? Anyone?
In case you’ve never seen Maynard in action, here’s a clip of him, showing his classmates the first portable music player, so he can listen to smooth jazz.
You all know my beef with wearing pajamas in public: NOT ACCEPTABLE. Not to the mailbox, not to walk your kids to the bus stop, not even to put your trash out on trash day. No, sir, we don’t do that. And that goes for slippers, too.
Not in the ghetto, not in the store, not in the driveway, do it no more.
Seriously, big fella? Did you think we wouldn’t notice?
And just because you are at Wal-Mart does not give a grown-ass woman free reign to wear onesies, especially with a faux designer bag.
Footsies! Really?
The only way this would EVER be acceptable is if you ran out of your burning house in the middle of the night, and ran straight to Wal-Mart to purchase bonafide normal clothes, appropriate for all to see, and you had the PRESENCE OF MIND to change into said new clothes in their rank restrooms before actually exiting the building.
The only other alternative I can see is to time travel back to 1962 and purchase any sleepwear from Montgomery Ward because I have thumbed through that ’62 Fall & Winter catalogue, and let me tell you–the pj’s are nicer than today’s styles.
Yes, these were sold as pajamas–cotton flannelettes, to be exact. Why, look at how gay and merry these ladies look! One’s got a telescope. That’s science!
And don’t be fooled into thinking you can’t look hip and trendy in these modest choices. These were made for sleeping, not twerking, but there’s nothing “square” about a shift gown. It says so right in the ad!
Before viewing this ad, I didn’t even realize I NEEDED a bonnet to accessorize my sleepwear. See how it helps her with those fancy yoga moves?
And let’s don’t forget the fellas. Why wear a wifebeater and pajama bottoms with the name of the university that you only attended for one semester twenty years ago when you could wear this?
Go ahead; bring your pipe. What’s not to love with so many colors and prints? This guy is right on time.
And hey, so what if you’ve packed on some pounds after turning 40? Hide that flabby belly underneath one of these swank terry robes, also in TALL and STOUT. That means 170 lbs in 1962.
And let’s not forget the kids. These pajama sets are publicly presentable.
Makes me want to take a trip to Dream Town myself! Those ski pajamas could go from bed to elementary school in no time. Why change at all when it’s so fashion forward? But leave the sleepers at home, kids. Those plastic soles won’t cut it on today’s asphalt parking lots.
Seriously, don’t Betty, Tommy, Sarah, and Mike look smart? Nothing outdated about these Easter eggshell pastels. I suddenly want to eat some Jordan Almonds. Hey, let’s get in the station wagon and get some at Wal-mart. But first, let me make sure I’ve got my 1962 pajama set on. I don’t want to look like I’ve given up on every dream I ever had or lost every last shred of dignity.
I came across this photo of Miss Catalina Lozano in a 1967 yearbook for the Schreiner Institute. I had to do a double-take, as she looks eerily like the daughter of Theresa Caputo, the Long Island Medium.
At the time the yearbook portrait was taken, Theresa Caputo had yet to be born. But I’d venture to say Catalina looks more like Victoria than Theresa herself.
Same flowing brunette locks, same Cocker Spaniel brown eyes, same nose, same lips…Victoria plus 1960s eyeliner equals Miss Chihuahua 1967. That’s all there is to it.
Actually, the flame was due less to Richard Simmons and more to the perils of frying turkey for Thanksgiving, which Shatner discusses here:
Flame-free and portly, he’s still truckin’ at 82 years old (and several months older than Regis!). Last year, he performed in a one-man show on Broadway, called Shatner’s World: We Just Live in It, and he makes consistent appearances on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Clearly, he’s having the last laugh.
But partying can get out of control. I think Roger got a little too fresh with Jeanne…
Pi Kappa Alpha partied like Royals at their Dream Girl Party. No red solo cups here.
Old or young, it didn’t matter. DEKEs liked to have a good time.
These Delta Gamma gals showered Ned with Christmas cheer.
Sigma Delta Tau knew their second amendment rights.
And Zeta Tau Alpha wore their sunglasses at night. Too cool for school, you guys.
I Don't Get It 
