Because Their Names Are Awesome
Category: Nostalgia
Thursday Trash Day: Level Epic
We reorganized our guest bedroom over the last few days, tweaking the western theme and moving furniture, painting touch-ups, and hanging frames. In the process, an old (read 1980s) dresser, about as tall as I am, was kicked to the curb for today’s trash men to carry away to a landfill far away from subdivisions, where people like me don’t have to give it another thought. Praise da Lort, as Madea would say.
Of course, we realized the dresser would be long gone by the time the trashmen made their mid-morning rounds; the scavengers come at sunrise to whisk away one man’s trash and make it their treasure. This is a given. Always has been, always will be. These are the same people who arrive for 10am garage sales at 7am, hepped up on Lort-knows-what and eager to haul off half your stash. Is it the same where you live?
We Wear Short Shorts
That’s a tight formation, boys.
Other than the silkiness of the shorts, the track and field outfits for these Dallas high school fellas in 1967 didn’t vary much from those in 1936 at the University of Kansas.
Less fabric = more ease of movement. And what a fine-looking trophy.
Still, a little more length in the shorts might be preferable. I don’t think he’s going to clear this one, y’all.
Nope, Still Feels Like Winter
When School Was Cool:1968
Hello? A jukebox in your high school lunchroom? What a great way to burn calories after a meal of cubed ham and ambrosia.
And lollipops, too? Sugar, sugar.
Bask in the sweet threads of Double V-neck and Paisley Prince, playing with electric race cars. Did they get class credit for this?
Even Algebra looks fun!
Perhaps I spoke to soon.
Where The Burgers Are Charco-Broiled
Last night I had a dream that I was on The 25,000 Pyramid, and I’d gotten to the Winner’s Circle with Melissa Joan Hart as my celebrity, giving me clues. She kept yelling “ham sandwich, ham sandwich” and all I could think was “Things You Eat At A Picnic,” “Things Kids Pack For Lunch,” “Things Pigs Turn Into”…And then the buzzer went off and she shook her head despairingly and I discovered the category was, “Things Mama Cass Died Of.” Which didn’t seem fair, since you usually only die of one thing, and that one thing was choking on a ham sandwich–not things plural. But then I remembered that was just an urban myth, and Cass actually had a heart attack at the age of 32. And really, if she was going to die of any sandwich, it should have been in a Hardee’s, where the burgers are charco-broiled, as she sang in the 1973 jingle.
Boy, The Way Glenn Miller Played
Songs that made the hit parade.
Guys like us we had it made.
Those were the days.
Mondays
Hill Country Football
Parasol Fit For A Queen
Before there was Her Majesty The Queen, there was Mary of Teck, strolling in the shade of the world’s largest tassled umbrella. Today’s umbrella-holders aren’t just reserved for royalty.
In this pre-“Happy” days pic from October 2013, Pharrell Williams is flanked by what looks to be a character from the extinct TV show JAG, along with a tipsy poor man’s Cameron Diaz. It’s all too reminiscent of bare-chested Puffy/P.Diddy’s manservant back in the day.
Per www.standard.co.uk, Fonzworth Bentley, former ‘gentleman’s gentleman’ (the Jeevesian term he favoured) to US rapper Sean ‘Puffy’ Combs, was obliged to follow his master with a parasol in hot weather. On one occasion, he had to jump straight back on a flight to the States from the Côte d’Azur after neglecting to bring the rapper’s chosen ties.
If you have the funds to send your butler on a flight to retrieve a specific set of ties, you might not have your priorities in order. Just think what good those funds could do elsewhere (homeless shelters, St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital, etc) if only Diddy could grip his own hook. It makes one wonder if Fonzworth buttoned that one button on Diddy’s shirt for him as well.
Moving on, we see POTUS has his own minion to shelter him from dastardly precip. Not exactly doing a spot-on job.
I don’t get it. Does it make you feel powerful to pay someone to perform menial tasks? Look at me; I came from nothing and now I have a butler. Or is it more like, Daddy didn’t pay attention to me, so by golly, I’ll show him? News flash: A lot of daddies don’t pay attention. Imperfect people make for a crumbling world. But your self-worth should not be tied to the extent of excess you’re willing to indulge.
And as Snoop Dogg shows us, flaunting one’s wealth is a key part of rap culture. It may be a shift from in-your-face gold chains and gold teeth, but it’s hardly discreet, an unfortunate show of extravagance. All I see is a little boy, trying to prove his value. But value will never equal money.
Winter’s Over: No More Chopping Wood!
Lawn Study
I Don't Get It 