Funny – Page 31 – I Don't Get It

Why Paint The Town Red When You Can Paint Your Home Pink?

Even more cliche than those drugstore Father’s Day cards referencing golf and ale consumption and handyman tools, are the ones that show Dad taking a paint roller to his bird’s egg blue brick house and painting it Pepto-Bismol pink.

Okay, so he’s actually painting a pink house blue. That makes more sense. Perhaps Mom just painted it pink a month ago for Mother’s Day, and now it’s HIS day and his color. He gets eleven months of blue, but she only gets four weeks of pink. That’s not fair.

But, really, what’s wrong with the pink? Pink houses were so coveted in the 80s, in fact, that John Cougar Mellencamp even wrote a song about it.

Here he is in the video, excitedly pumping up the cheerleader and sweat-domed, sleeveless buddy whom he had recruited to paint the basic white clapboard house behind him. All hail pink houses! And really, ain’t that America, for you and me?

The ad continues with way more paragraphs than necessary, as was the way back in the day, when people weren’t reading posts on phones and had plenty of time to sit and read a short-story-length ad on paint.

And what mid-century dad didn’t appreciate a can of SPRED Glide-On, not to be confused with Astroglide? Glidden also made a latex wall paint called SPRED Satin, for even fancier fathers.

So maybe Dad didn’t want a pink house for good reason. What do you think? A palace fit for a king? Not even for a vacation house? Sometimes less is more.

Dad Can’t Wait To Open His Father’s Day Card

Ears Like Taxi Cab Doors

Yep, Mom’s Still Mad

Pretty Sure That Was A Red Light, Stan

In the spring of 1958, LIFE photographer Russell Halford took a series of photos of Los Angeles motorists.

Some were irritated.

Some were happy to offer a light.

And some were dangerously mid-beauty routine.

I don’t think it’s going to help.

As an aside, note the nub shown through her window. That’s how we used to lock car doors. You could push them up and down.

Barb Grabbing Barbed Wire

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Barb was feeling solid that day. Clem had his good tie and hat on (the one that covered his high and tight, Macklemore-y, I was Fascist when Fascist wasn’t cool haircut), and the world was alive with possibility. The homestead was thriving. The fence posts were fenceposting. Barb threw caution to the wind and climbed aboard the fence and didn’t even care if the wire cut into the flesh of her palm. Her dress was fierce, her hair was amazing (think early Peanuts Lucy). What’s a little blood in the scheme of things?

That Moment She Realizes He’s Copping A Feel

Getting Jiggy On What Would Have Been Mr. Rogers’s 90th Birthday

Baked Alaska To Celebrate

I have so many questions about this image. Some simple assumptions would be that this couple is celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary. And by the lettering to the right of the cake, I’ll assume the wife is named Cora. But why is she wearing a dress and pearls, when he is wearing a robe and boutonnière? Is that a cake or just a heap of whipped cream? Is it melting? And what is that brick before the cake? Surely it’s not napkins.