Female Joe Dirt
Category: Style
Refresh Me
Puddle Jumping
And where is a man to lay down his cape, so that the women may pass? Indeed, this puddle is much too deep for that, and too wide.
Here in Central Texas, we have received more spring rain than I can ever remember, and still more threatens through Saturday, though we pray it ends today. There’s only so much dirty puddle water one can tolerate sloshing about in her high heels.
Greyhound Bus Terminal, 1947
Rice Showers
Newlyweds Anne Nafe and Edwin Marks exit the Danforth Chapel on the K.U. campus.
Tights And Loafers
This February 1941 LIFE article states that these colored stockings are head-turners. I agree that these green stockings DO turns head, but not for the right reasons. I don’t know any gal who’d find those a compliment to her ensemble.
They actually look much better in black and white, especially when paired with lovely smiles and (of course) a bottle of Coke. Coke makes everything better. 
Boy, this gal is a stunner, such a lovely image of spring.
Evidently, stockings are made of lisle, a word with which modern women are not familiar.
lisle. n. 1. a fine, high-twisted and hard-twisted cotton thread, at least two-ply, used for hosiery, gloves, etc.
The only Lyle with which I’m familiar is Waggoner, the actor from “The Carol Burnett Show.” Did you know he’s been married to his wife for 58 years??
Ben, The Two Of Us Need Look No More
Suit Up For Spring!
Is anything more refreshing than a lakeside dip in seven pounds of swimsuit? It looks like a good way to get pulled under by a current. And who’s got time for a watery grave these days? Hard pass.
At the turn of the century before the turn of this last century, folks was modest. Bared female knees were considered skanktastic, although this man’s naked knees are evidently enjoying 1900, where the living is easy. He does seem a bit cold, though. Perhaps he also should have worn a button down dress.
Photographer Telfer snapped this pic in Cooperstown, NY, at the waters of Otsego Lake. Americanheritage.com says, “Most people know Coooperstown as the home of novelist James Fenimore Cooper, a beautiful resort, and as the place where baseball was supposedly invented by Abner Doubleday.” But I’ve never heard any of those things until about three minutes ago, so there you are.
Those Bangs Tho
While I admit that Sophia Loren is a beautiful woman (no question), this image doesn’t sit well with me. It’s not just the fact that the hair is reminiscent of Klute hair (go Google that on your own time); it’s that this photo is credited as being taken in 1960. It doesn’t seem consistent with the moment. Think of Marilyn Monroe in 1960. This was not the style. Plus, it’s ew.
The classic Sophia has voluminous dark hair and thick eyeliner and a bosom for days.
If she’s supposed to be dressed in day-laboring peasant clothes, we’re not buying it. Her stare is regal, almost confrontational. Her skin is supple and dark, her posture solid.
Early blond bleach job Sophia is lovely (and ever-voluptuous), but nearly unrecognizable.
The internet is full of Sophia images with her arms raised, hairy armpits on display. Is that the Italian way? I’ll spare you those, as well as the classic Jayne Mansfield side-eye.
So instead, I’ll leave you with this playful one.
And this chiropractor’s nightmare.
Or fantasy, depending on your perspective.
Picnic Table Lecture
Overaccessorizing With Pottery
When Your BFF Is Packing Two Coors Banquets In Her Hair For Later
Coors Banquet beer was black market back in the day, only distributed within some 13 western U.S. states. Per firstwefeast.com, in the 1970’s:
Coors claimed that not only could they not make enough beer, but that their unpasteurized brew demanded being distributed exclusively via refrigerated trucks, lest it “spoil.” Thus, a mystique was built, and soon east coast folks were smuggling cases upon cases of the beer back home after a visit to the Rockies. In 1977, Coors even took out an ad in the Washington Post saying “Please don’t buy our beer,” insisting any in the area was clearly black market, mishandled, and prone to becoming “watery” (you can laugh now). This insane thirst for Coors hit its apex with the release of Smokey and the Bandit, the Burt Reynolds action-comedy about a legendary trucker willing to risk life, limb, and the law to illegally smuggle crates of Coors back to Georgia.
This ’79 ad for said beer plays like an ad for America itself. Coors Banquet is “born where eagles speak, and the sunrise slides from peak to peak.” Clearly, it’s “no downstream beer.”
I Don't Get It 