Category: Funny

How To Party Like It’s 1970

Once you’ve worked up a sweat, go grab yourself a glass of cold refreshments from an ancient chaperone.

1970 Blackcat

Dance to the groovy tunes of a guy wearing a headband.

And if possible, be crowned something that proves you’re better than everyone else.

See the envy in their eyes as you rock that crown. Dang, it feels good to be a gangster.

Fisherman Chic Linked To Recent Eye-Gouging

Portuguese fishermen, Nat Geo 11/48

As you can see, the fishermen of Nazaré, Portugal traditionally donned checkered garb and long, wool hats (which could work double-duty as Christmas elves).

flickr

Doesn’t he look like Santa’s long-lost lumberjack cousin?

aveiro-portugal-portuguese
Pinterest

And tradition is not entirely lost to this day.

http://smitachandra.com/blog/2013

 

Before Gaga’s Meat Dress, There Was Frank Skirt

http://www.ebaumsworld.com

Geene Courtney had the honor of being Queen of National Hot Dog Week 1955, a pageant sponsored by the Zion Meat Company. Personally, I’d rather have skipped the meat scarf and just posed with a fish on a skyscraper. 

Gail Hooper was paired with this 56-pound catfish (that must have been carried up an elevator all those flights of the Hotel New Yorker), as part of her duty as Miss National Catfish Queen in 1954. 

I imagine they both took long, hat baths after that!

I Am The Captain Now (Cone Dog Establishes Herself As Alpha)

Cone Dog finished up her last antibiotic with peanut butter, and her incision is healing nicely. We even gave her the bath of all baths last night–although technically it was a shower. All the layers of multiple animal shelter germs went down the drain, and all her cloth items were freshly laundered, so she can be the Queen of Sheba like crazy dog ladies let their dogs become. It shall not be so! The human is the master. Never defy the Dog Whisperer.

Anyway, we figured it was time to let her cavort with Tonto, eight years her senior, since they will be cellmates friends till death do them part. She quickly established herself as younger, faster, and more energetic.

Who was this demon invading his territory? Why did she want to play? He just wants to lie around in his comfortable obesity and unquenchable need for attention and submissively pee himself, as he has always done. But Cone Dog is the captain now. Cone Dog controls her bladder, and Cone Dog controls Tonto. Tonto’s face says it all. Why couldn’t you have let me be an only dog??

Because, Tonto, God said it was not good for man to be alone. So now your neutered self and her spayed self can have have many years of merriment together. You’re welcome.