Ever thought about painting your front door to add a little pop, a little pizzazz? Those folks at HGTV make it seem so easy, and red is often the color of choice. But could you handle something in fire engine red? One of our neighbors can. And did.
Maybe it’s not adding pizzazz as much as a desire for pizzas. After spending my college years in food service, I am well aware that red makes folks hungry. These signs can attest to that.
I’m already salivating! But why would you want to make your guests hungry? That just means you have to serve them. Does the color even have to mean anything? Evidently, it does.
The folks at Home Decor Bliss suggest that red has a welcoming energy, bringing luck, proclaiming protection, and even announcing that you’ve paid your last mortgage payment. Who knew that was a thing? Well, www.apartmenttherapy.com explains that while you may have heard that our friends in Scotland paint doors red to symbolize when they’re “out of the red,” it’s largely a myth. At that point, there’s no money left for a bucket of paint.
Not a fan of red doors? Well, you’re not alone. As the Rolling Stones once sang, “I see a red door, and I want it painted black.” Sounds controlling to me.
Tired of walking past those round wooden spindles pre-turn of this century? Ashamed to have guests notice that yellow browncolor that dates your abode? I wouldn’t even want to visit a home with this shade of devil’s stain. Why, it’s the shade of nicotine teeth.
Sure, you could replace them with wrought iron balusters, but isn’t that trite? What you need is to get yourself a big honking coconut tree, get your best stabbing knife, and knotch it up at intervals as make-shift steps!
So rustic! So tropical! Won’t your friends be jealous? Test their agility by testing whether rails were even necessary to make it upstairs or just holding them back. Granted, your own kids may miss bumping down a carpeted stairway in a laundry basket, or being able to carry anything at all, instead of having to carefully clutch the sides of a rough trunk to escape the monsoon. But practice makes perfect! And ladies, no more short skirts. Not on this coconut tree!
Worried you won’t be able to deck them out with Christmas festivity, as in days of yore?
Nonsense! Wrap that sucker up with some classic white LED lights. Just make sure not to step on them as you climb. Ouch!