Delicious Brick Oven Pizza

Illustrated history of the United States
Illustrated History of the United States

Yesterday, after church, we were saying goodbye to one of our token old people, asking about his latest stent implantation and his knees, sharing about the pizza buffet we’d visited the day before, to which he scrunched up his nose. He nearly shivered with disgust, the way I do when I hear that Kevin Smith will be a guest on tonight’s late-night talk shows.

You see, our septuagenarian hates dairy. He’s not even lactose-intolerant. He just doesn’t like cheese. Even though there are a bajillion cheeses in this world–creamy, melty, full-fat cheeses, he doesn’t cotton to them. And that pretty much rules out a ton of mealtime options. Including pizza. I don’t get it. I’ll eat pretty much any flavor of pizza, thin ‘n’ crispy or deep dish, and I’ll eat it cold for breakfast the next morning. Throw an egg on it, I don’t care.

john's pizzeria
john’s pizzeria

So even though he’s not right in the head, bless his heart, we love him anyway–misguided opinions and all. I understand why he’s so grumpy all the time now. Life without cheese is no life at all.

Oh, and P.S.–that first image isn’t a brick oven at all. It’s a glass factory about 100 years ago, with some child labor thrown in for fun. I’m sure that standing all day on bricks and breathing in that stagnant air made for a long work shift. I bet those boys wouldn’t be prat enough to turn down some cheese.

6 thoughts on “Delicious Brick Oven Pizza

  1. I am at a loss. I don’t get it. An old man doesn’t like cheese and people are supposed to “celebrate ” his “tastes”. Sorry. I think someone should tell the old guy to suck it up.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve known people who rejected an entire food group for reasons known only to them. Sometimes it could be due to a “childhood trauma” revolving around food – especially in older generations who lived through times of rationing and god knows what else. Still…your post is pure hilarity.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! Your reasons sound plausible. They used to make us eat pimento cheese sandwiches in pre-school and I LOATHED them until I had a pimento cheese-stuffed jalapeno as an adult and changed my mind. Trauma!

      Liked by 1 person

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