During these heady times, it’s hard to refrain from going stir crazy. But keep in mind that cabin fever is always better than lowgrade fever. Even the President said a hell-to-the-no when Birx mentioned her fever.
In the words of Nirvana, stay away.
Running out of ideas for solo activities? Well, let’s take a cue from history.
You could make a pyramid, reminiscent of the wonder of the world. You will be self-isolating, so no one will see your Daisy Dukes or judge your ale intake.
You could bundle up under the covers and read a good book, or just the Cliff’s Notes.
Catch up on the funnies in your paper.
You could science up and create a vaccine.
Or spend time with microfilm. How long has it been?
Try tobacco! And maybe write the Great America Novel while you’re at it!
Lie on your bed (but first take your saddle oxfords off because the virus can stay on the soles of your shoes for days) and think about yesterday, when all your troubles seemed so far away.
Pick up the telly and place a call to an elder relative whom you usually avoid because conversations with them are meandering and taxing and oppose your belief system.
If spring has sprung in your town, pack a sack lunch and head over to a nearby park, spray the entire bench with Lysol, sit down, and enjoy a snack, while hearing the mating calls of the doves.
And if you are part of the unfortunate “essential” few who have to be in public, remember to wear your mask.
I Don't Get It 
What a wonderful piece. Clever, timely and it has pictures too. I just found out today about the virus and shoe soles thing. Now I have to worry about what shoes I wear outside. Personally I like Yahtzee & beer. There is only so much TCM and basketball reruns I want to see.
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I can definitely understand your choices there. And yes, they keep giving us more things to worry about!
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I like the meme circulating:
“15 days without sports. Spotted a lady sitting on my sofa. She said she was my wife. Huh…seems like a nice lady.”
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Sounds like he’s on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Glad I don’t care a fig for sports!
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Thanks for the pictures Kerbey! I like the last one especially.
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Sad cop?
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It just wasn’t the mask I was expecting to see. Made me LOL
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My memories go back to a chosen few of the photos Kerbey. No, not that far back, smartie. I will cop to cutting off my own shorts to a level that would not stand up to today’s standards, but lower than the guzzler in Cactus 72.
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It was the era, man. What can you do?
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Brilliant. Loved the Emmett Kelly mask. I used to have an EK clown doll that I loved to console. Ha.
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Oh, is that his name?
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