Follow Me For More Recipes

pleated jeans

I saw this pic today of a patron in a Texas HEB and knew that I could not keep it to myself. At first, I thought someone was hoarding foil or plastic wrap. Then I realized it was Hungry-Man frozen dinners. Dozens of them, supplemented by what appear to be frozen pizzas and some Stouffers tossed in. But the core demand here was blue cartons. All of them. The entire stock. It reminds me of the Parks and Rec scene wherein Ron Swanson demands ALL of the bacon and eggs.

Is this a Christmas gift for a home-bound relative? Is the gift of cardiac failure and diabetes the gift that keeps on giving? I myself have never eaten Hungry-Man. So my palate never knew a salisbury steak nor a meatloaf. But who could not be tempted by this chicken caressing a waffle? Are you a man or a mouse? EAT LIKE A MAN.

Pinnacle Foods

Does that tactic really work in this day and age, where gender is as fluid as the maple syrup on that waffle? Many men today have never changed their own oil, chopped firewood, or kilt them a bar when they was only three. More men today have eaten couscous and know how to properly say acai. But not at Hungry Man. They doubled down with their new double meat bowls because America. Chute, yeah. Try their Mexican Fiesta Enchiladas, complete with coconut-flavored pudding. If that’s not diverse, I don’t know what is.

I can’t see Millennials buying these. Why buy a $4 meal when you can buy a $7 green smoothie? So it must be older folk. Will sales plummet as years go by? All I know is there’s a giant vacancy in the frozen foods department, and a man somewhere who won’t be hungry for long.

9 thoughts on “Follow Me For More Recipes

  1. I. too, have never eaten a Hungry Man. The dinner I mean but the other interpretation too. Not that there’s anything wrong…oh, never mind. Anyhoo, neither have I eaten chicken and waffles together. Nope, not even once. There, I said it, came clean and now you know my deep dark secret. I can never show my hungry face in the South again.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No, I get it. We tried them once years ago when we visited South Carolina, and the chicken was dry, the waffle was meh, and we’ll never order it again. I’d rather have two normal sides with chicken.

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  2. I was going to comment Foiled, Kerbey, but then I read on and had to change my mind to Never use a pot again. I’ve been known to munch a Banquet or frozen pizza when left to my own devices but this is over the top for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No disrespect to frozen dinners. I can’t tell you how many Michelangelo’s eggplant parmesan we’ve had. But taking that much of any item leaves nothing for the rest of the people who want it.

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