So You Think You Want A Boob Job?

tori spelling

What ARE those?  Isn’t Tori Spelling a millionaire several times over?  Can’t she afford a nice rack?  What was wrong with her old one?

And Victoria Beckham, it’s bad enough that your smile’s been broken for twenty years, but what sort of atrocity is this?  You look like the rough draft of Madame Tussaud’s wax version of Kate Gosling.

I mean, don’t these women have access to the BEST of the BEST?  What kind of botched job would I wind up with, if THEIR doctors are the best in their field?

Really, Jewel?  That’s not very bohemian and down to earth of you.  I thought you lived on a ranch with your cowboy husband; you don’t have to subscribe to the L.A. ideal.  Honestly.

Super Hero Hype & Celebrity Gossipshow

Super Hero Hype & Celebrity Gossipshow

Oh, Tara Reid.  I have no words.

My advice to starlets: don’t do it.  But if you must, you must increase your bust, go small, like Cameron Diaz.

You’ll thank yourself when you’re 55.