I’m sorry if that’s catty, but I’m drinking decaf today. Maybe I should have called this post: IT’S. A. MIRACLE. It’s a miracle… You have to be old enough to appreciate that. Or move, move, move away from me, darling. Let’s hope ab crunches and eating porridge with cherries will keep him too busy to kidnap any more male escorts. Maybe its the curse of being a Brit named George. See George Michael and his penchant for lewd acts with strangers in public toilets. Hygiene, people!
Anyway, the point of this post is not to rip Mr. O’Dowd a new one (stifling puns here), but rather to assess the merits of his former bandmates on the cover of the February 1985 Teen Stars Photo Album.
Mikey Craig is sporting an overalls halter (you know you own one), with a sliver of plaid to match whatever the H that is he’s wearing as pants/shorts/skirt. Isn’t that belt a little big for him? Maybe it’s used more for disciplinary spanking purposes than for unnecessary cinching. Frankly, he may need to let it out because he looks perturbed beyond all reason. And his hair accessory looks like an Olivia Newton-John headband made out of a discarded Cosby Sweater.
George’s former flame, the now-divorced Jon Moss, is sporting a patchwork quilt shirt that appears to be a precursor to early 90s Garth Brooks apparel. A hodgepodge of prints keeps you from limiting yourself to one identity (or one sexuality, Mr. Gay Today, Straight Tomorrow). You can purchase a similar one for only $70.
Seventy dollars?!! Somebody needs to listen to the lyrics of “Thrift Shop.” Swindled indeed. Speaking of thrift shop, O’Dowdy appears to have scored a lovely pink trench at his local branch.
With his festive hair ribbons, plucked brows, and blush, he is definitely the feminine counterpart to Jon’s butch football shirt (pick a team already) and Z. Cavaricci knock-off trousers. Is it the Fourth of July? No, they don’t celebrate that in the U.K. Is his purse full of heroin and regret?